We are official. We are an open foster home. We received the call while Kendan was in the hospital with pneumonia saying that our home had been approved. :) The next week we went to the beach, and while we were there we got THE call. Our DFCS lady called us and said she had twin 12 year old girls (names will be withheld purposely on here) that needed care, and asked if we'd take them. We had specified that we would take children younger than Hudson or a much older GIRL. Josh and I discussed it, and decided we would care for them.
October 28th we picked them up from a temporary foster home where they had been placed when they first came into care. That first weekend was rather overwhelming for me. I thought many times, "what have we gotten into?" I didn't yet know the girls, and was beating myself up that I didn't feel overwhelming love for them immediately. After a talk with my mom I realized I was being unrealistic. She reminded me that some mothers have their biological babies and don't immediately feel overwhelming love...she was so right. I remember thinking at the hospital with Hudson & Kendan something was wrong with me because the love had to grow over time. I loved Hudson & Kendan, but it wasn't an overwhelmingly gushy love like I expected. It didn't take long though before it reached gushy with each of my boys. So, I relaxed a bit and jumped into mommy mode: scheduling appointments, helping with homework, making sure basic needs were met, and getting to know our new additions.
We have 2 very sweet girls that have joined our family. We are not sure how long they will be a part of our family, but they fit right in. My boys love them, and they enjoy helping me with the boys. They love our church, and beg to go to EVERY event. It is fun having girls in the house.
I do not know how long they will be with us, but I do know this: THEY ARE IN MY HOME FOR A REASON. God has made this VERY clear! I have a good friend that I know from high school, and we now work together at Burnt Hickory. She and I were discussing some things, and I was talking about some little things I have seen with the girls. She then starts telling me all about a similar situation she had with a child when she taught school. That night the kids and I were up at church, and my friend walks in and meets the girls. She and I realize that she had been talking about MY foster child and we didn't even know it! We had been talking about the SAME child! She taught one of my girls in 2nd grade 5 years ago!!!! She was fighting back tears, and I had goosebumps. That is MORE than a coincidence. So, since I know they are here for a reason, I am just mothering them like I would my own and trusting God. I do not know His plan, but I know He's got one. I also know I can trust Him!
So, life is crazy busy, fun, hectic, and awesome all at the same time! I have 2 boys and 2 girls...just like I always wanted! :) Sidenote: my mom has a letter she wrote to my aunt when I was little all about the talk she and I had on a drive home from Kentucky. I was telling her about my life when I got older and what it would look like, complete with 2 sets of twins: boys and girls. (Only in my little head they were all exactly the same age, so more like quadruplets). HA HA My aunt framed that part of the letter and gave it to my mom many years later. My God has a good sense of humor...and He loves me like crazy!
It's hard learning how to mother girls when I haven't learned it all along from the beginning. It's hard mothering middle school age girls and jumping in with homework and assignments and school stuff. It's hard hearing about them talk about their life up until 3 weeks ago. It's hard. But it's WORTH it! I know that tonight they are safe, warm, fed, and loved. I know that tonight they will sleep well.
That's where we are at this moment in time. We have 4 children for now. That's our life in a snapshot. We are loving it. I love knowing that God has put us together right now. "Being a mother is a holy privilege."
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